I went to Downtown Silver Spring with Fabrizio today. Today was just a lot of hype for it to be honest. Because we all know he makes my heart go a little crazy. But ah well. Kevin talked to me about it. I talked about his good points for a while because there are honestly so many. And Kevin said "aww Sammy's in love". "Not with him. Love him, but he's not the one I'm IN LOVE with." "Who is?" Which was such a weird question 'cause why are we both implying that I am in love at all and why would I know that right now? But, as one would expect, the question of "Who is this kid from Canada that you've been writing letters to?" came up. And I can't explain this really. But the way I spoke... it was different. Like, it was even obvious to me just how much more... SOMETHING I was when I talked about "my best friend JuanJosé" as opposed to "the cute guy at church Fabrizio". It should've been my first hint. Well, it was. I was aware of it. I just chose to ignore it.
Lemme tell you I looked cute today. I decided to wear stuff I'm not allowed to wear to work (or just don't wear for convenience). So flats, white shorts, low cut-ish shirt, Stitch necklace, and bright red lips. Today's outfit was yes. And it was 100% not for him. I loved it and that's all that matters.
The night was full of song. DTSS had so much life and the air was so warm and lovely. There were so many live bands and it was just so exciting. Our conversations were dull already, but in comparison. Boy. I mean it was fine honestly and we had fun and we kept the conversation going and all. But nothing impresses him and nothing excites him and few things interest him. That's an exaggeration, but hey we didn't see Star Wars or Dragonball Z, so few reactions were anything beyond "Oh cool".
Day 22: Parallel Lines
like our very linear conversation
The lines on the theater over the awesome band
On the way back, we were listening to the radio. Shut Up & Dance came on. He said "I hate this song" and flipped through several stations. It was actually kinda funny. He hated every song that came on, and it wasn't even an angry hate but like a "next" kinda tone, until he just got static and said "I can't even hear this one". He went back to Shut Up & Dance as a lesser evil. I said nothing. I just danced in the car and smiled because I felt like I had reached an amazing conclusion. I then said "I think of you every time I hear it." "Why?" "I heard it for the first time in October, and it was very relevant to our situation at the time" "Uhh what was October? Haha this year has been a long bad blur" "Well at that point I was basically waiting for an answer" "Oh. Oh" "Yeah haha" "I'm sorry hah" "no no it's fine I have a memory for these things, most people don't" "No I usually do to it's just... if it makes you feel better, someone else was waiting for an answer, too hahaha. But I just told HER to leave me alone. At least I didn't tell you that" "No sweetie haha it doesn't but thank you." We finally got home and I thought I'd hug him goodbye and give him a kiss on the cheek, because that's what I usually do when a friend drives me home. My mom had apparently just gotten home cause she was just getting out of her car. So he said hi to her, gave her a hug, and then gave me one. God has spoken. It is not meant to be. Not at all. Never in a million years. THANK. GOD.
I need someone who will sing with me.
And I need someone who will dance.
And I need someone who will dance.
I've just gotta find the right heart song
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