The Dress

December of last year, we had semi-formal with Alpha Psi Omega. The theme was myths and legends. So I decided to go as the princess from the Legend of the Blue Rose. Because I'm me and that's perfect. And I thought, well I'll just wear my bridesmaid dress from Karla's wedding. It is the perfect shade of blue AND that dress made me look and feel amazing on what was the best day of my life. So I packed the pretty thing up and it hung on my closet door for a few weeks.

Day of the dance, I am getting ready, and I finally put on the dress. It won't zip. Just won't zip. Won't go up. And I'm mortified. And so ashamed. Because it fit beautifully two years prior. And now it would not even pretend to zip. Had it been literally any other item of clothing, I would have been fine. I could have torn the dang thing and been alright. But not this dress. I sucked it up and put on a cardigan and literally hated myself for the rest of the evening. And that night is what finally got me to start taking care of myself. Within the next week, I started my diet and exercise plan. I think I officially started on December 12. A lot has changed since then but, one way or another, I have managed to lose weight in a healthy and safe way and get closer to my goal.

Something in me literally shouted at me this afternoon, once I was unpacked and settled back at home, and told me I had to try this dress on effective immediately. And who am I to tell the voices in my head no, amiright?

It fits like a dream. I could not be happier. I can't begin to tell you how thrilled I am. Seriously. Beyond words. Because in less than a year, I lost the weight that I gained in two years and two months. I've made progress. I set out to do something and I freaking did it. I didn't realize how absolutely happy I would be and how great I would feel once I put that dress back on.

I'm sorry if this seems superficial and shallow. Maybe it is. I mean, I'm still not at my goal weight, so I will continue to keep working. And I know I should not be so caught up on my appearance. But appearances aside, I accomplished something. I did it in the way that was right for me. And now I know that I'm capable of reaching my goals and keeping my resolutions as long as I am determined and have God on my side. Maybe making me too sick to workout these past two weeks was His way of saying, hey slow down, you're doing alright. Who knows really? But He helped me get here and I couldn't be more grateful!