Goin' Crazy

Reason 325: Worktime stories!! I was actually going to save these for our next letter, but stuff happened today that had me rolling! So I shall share these fun times with you.

So I'd never been hit on. Actually. It just wasn't a thing. It never happened. My friends got hit on. They complained about it. Asked me if I could relate. And I couldn't. Like, not even someone honking at me. It just doesn't happen. But ever since I've started working, that's changed. HOWEVER. I'm just wondering? Is there a reason it's only Latino men? Like, ugly guys is one thing, but not even that. It's all creepy old Latino men. Like 40+. (No that is not old but it is old in comparison to me).

Not even kidding, some kid walked in. Looked like he was maybe 17. And he was actually pretty attractive. HIS DAD hit on me. What? No.  STOP.

Questions I get on the daily: What's your name? Not too bad. Are you new here? Okay, yes, duh, but whatever. Where do you live? Can you not? Are you married? TF?!?! NO. NO TO YOU SIR. My biggest failure is when people ask how old I am and I actually answer 18. No, Sammy, you dingus! You look 12! Use it!

Incident that happened to me on Saturday: Group of 4 guys. Friends. Obviously having some kind of cookout. They have a LOT of groceries, so it's taking me a while. One guy is clearly talking more than the rest of them. And there's that inflection where he wants something. Bro, just speak normally, it's less intimidating. "Good afternoon!" "Hey" Excuse you, I'm a lady. Address me as such. "How are you today?" "Oh I'm doing great. How about you?" "Fine, thank you." Looks at the last friend in line "Hey Shorty, she's about your height" Really bro. They all laugh. Shorty looks me up and down as if he's allowed to do so. "Wow. She's a pretty one." I make the biggest stank face of my life, looking away from him, but I know his other friends see it. "So how old are you?" "18." "Oh, so she's of age." DANGITDANGITDANGIT. "Yeah, but I look I'm 12 and act like I'm 5". They all laugh. "Yeah? Well that's even better." TF. They continually laugh amongst themselves and look at Shorty. They get him to pay me. "Thanks for everything. Hopefully we see you again soon". No goodbye. Nope. Not okay with this. You may leave. One creepy guy is one thing. Four at once making jokes at my expense is not alright.

WELP. Lesson learned. Say no to Latino men. TODAY though. LOL. Today. So dude walks in. Looks like he's 45. "You're new right?" "Yessir". "Well aren't you cute?" "..." "You really are pretty" "Do you want bags?" "Oh yeah. Wow. Your husband must be 'real proud of you" "I'm not even 18 yet" "OH. YOU'RE NOT 18. Oh my gosh. I'm so sorry. Forget I said anything! Sorry. I'm just. I'm going crazy or something. So so sorry." And he leaves embarrassed. I DIED. The look on his face was brilliant. He was like CRAP. I CAN'T DO THIS. CRAP. Priceless. Best decision I've made since I started work. Whoo Pervert Repellant! Well, one would hope...

What do?

Reason 319: So I told you about Mr. Dennis before, but for the purposes of this blog I shall retell the story. There's this kid whose name is Dennis. He is 15, Hispanic, goes to Northwood. He shops at the store often. He is incredibly friendly and always strikes up a conversation with whoever is at the register. I'm fairly certain he has some type of autism. But I think that may be why he's so friendly. Well today, I was coming back to the store after my lunch break (I eat in the office downstairs with my mom) and he was leaving the store. He sees me and asks how I'm doing. And he goes onto tell me that I'm very pretty and cute. At which point I turn bright red because I CANNOT handle compliments ever. And he's all concerned and asks "Too awkward?" to which I reply honestly "No, not at all. It was very flattering". He smiles and goes about his way. Gah. He's a sweetheart and he makes my day.

I can't stop playing this. Nope. Can't do it. In my head ALL THE TIME.